Chasing Cars

Is so fun.

I love it. I think about it every night at 11. It completes my day. I don't care if she gets all weird about being scared or upset. It is sorta cute and sorta "shhhh stop worrying." Then it just degrades into me being me and her being her. And that ends up so wonderful.

There were all those nice times with S. But honestly, it does take finding out what love isn't to learn what love is. And not that she wasn't love, and I don't think that it was us rushing any longer. I just think there was no connection at a deeper level.

But there is here. Holy crap is it amazing. Having that, "friends first" as they call it, background. It does cause more worry, but at the same time it makes things so much better. There are no dancing around things, no awkward conversations, no tip toeing over matters. You may still worry and may still not want things to change. But who wants to be mad at someone they love? Not me. But it is a necessary part of a relationship, and fixing it so that you are no longer mad is a very good thing to have in a relationship. So we can work on that.

But not worrying about what to say is good. Having so much knowledge already helps. It allows for more time to explore and learn together, and less catching up and learning the past.

So let us toast to the past, live in the present, and let the gods bless the future.