Justice is cruel. Things just happen that way. They latch onto fallacies and half-truths, unaware that if they had patience then things would be better in the end. Instead the world aims for depreciation. And I am here to clean up the mess.
“I have to be here,” the sound is strange to me, even though it is mine.
“Why bother? One person can’t change the world,” a sonorous melody reached my ears this time.
“Why do you always sneak up on me?”
Scantly illuminated by starlight the ground lost its green sheen, instead appeared to be silver streaked blue. Funny how different things seem at different times of day.
“I can’t help it. Did I scare you?”
“No.”
“Liar.”
I rose from the dew laden ground, rubbing the cold moisture from my body. Tracing my usual path back to the city, I yearned for a companion. Someone to share this cruel world with. With the help of a partner things could be so much easier.
“You’re wrong. You’re better off with me,” the melody returned, echoing in my head.
“But. I can save more people when I don’t have to do it alone.”
“Others will just get in your way.”
“I guess you’re right.”
That voice was sweet nectar sometimes. It knew exactly how to solve my problems.
I make it back to my domicile before my alarm clock jumps to life. Warm in my room I settle under the blankets, ready to catch a few breaths of sleep.
“I hate that alarm. Why do you use such a droning sound?” the voice returned, muffled by my blaring alarm clock.
“To annoy the hell out of you. Now go back to sleep,” I reply nonchalantly. Six o’clock on the dot.
I felt the voice disappear, fade into sleep. Feeling my back straighten I knew the weight was gone. But as soon as one weight vanishes, another comes to take its place. As I dressed I felt my muscles complain, every movement was lethargic and took more effort than was worth.
But school was important; to me at least. I think.
Downstairs my dad was leafing through yesterday’s paper in his chair at the dining room table. A steaming mug of coffee was loosely gripped in his left hand. He was dressed for work, but I found it funny that he didn’t have to be in for another three hours and could walk the two miles to the office in not much more than thirty minutes.
“G’morning dad,” I said.
All I got in response was a grunt. Not like I ever got more than that. But it’s not about that.
“Did you leave any coffee?” I asked as I headed to the kitchen.
Before I got any sort of reply I noticed the empty pitcher in the sink and the empty can of coffee on the counter.
“You don’t need that stuff,” finally came my dad’s reply.
“That’s not what you said last year. You said that I don’t need the sleeping pills. I should just drink lots of caffeine,” I argued.
“Those pills were a drain on my income. And a waste,” he muttered.
“And coffee isn’t?” I responded.
“Some things are worse than others,” he said before taking a large gulp from his mug.
He is right.
I went to the fridge to find something else to help wake me up. Nothing. As usual. Oh well.
“Dad can I have five bucks for breakfast?” I asked, coming back into the dinning room to gather my things for school.
“No.”
That was simple enough. “Why not?” I feel like asking even though I know what the answer will be.
“Because I don’t want to give you any money.” Then as an after thought, “Shouldn’t you be heading off to school? I pay taxes to get you out of my hair. So run along.”
“I’m going I’m going.” It’s true, I am. There isn’t much to do anyway.
I think about last night, the cool hard pavement swiftly passing beneath my feet. Well it seemed like a normal night, possibly. I mean Cleo was there. Not much more to say than that. I’m glad he can get out and express himself in a harmless environment though.
Sometimes there isn’t any fighting those feelings you get. You know the ones deep inside your head. I don’t even realize they are there anymore. Cleo takes care of them. He sneaks up on me and lets loose his anger, disappears for a time, then comes back.
“Hey Sebastian,” blonde hair, blue eyed Susie came up to me with a jolly appearance. Frankly those pearly whites annoyed me a little sometimes. But she was my best friend, my only friend.
“Hi Susie,” I replied. There was an edge to my voice that I could not identify with. Cleo was probably having a restless sleep. Sometimes he would insert his hate into my daily activities. I dealt with the puzzled looks or the spiteful reactions. Maybe that’s why only Susie was my friend; she was always jolly and happy, nothing I said or did ever upset her.
“Did you sleep last night?” she asked innocently. She knew about what the insomnia, but not Cleo. No one did. He preferred it that way.
“A few minutes.”
“Oh.” Still that smile fought on. I detected some concern in her eyes, but by now she had to be used to it. I kept walking towards homeroom as she started to lag behind. She may have been heading to her locker, or just puzzled at how to continue the conversation. Sometimes it was like that. The conversation would drag, or we would be silent altogether.
Sometime later that day Susie approached me again.
“Hey,” she said. I had never gotten the shy vibe from her before, but this time she reeked of it.
“You okay?” I asked.
“Yeah. I was just wondering—” she trailed off. She kept her head down when she wasn’t speaking and would not look me in the eye when she was.
“Wondering what?” I shut my locker and turned towards her fully. Again contempt welled up in my chest, but concern won out. Cleo was just jealous that I cared about Susie.
“I was wondering if you’d like to come to my house after school?” a sigh escaped her lips after she got it out.
I needed to get some homework done, but it felt wrong when I thought about saying no. How could I not? She was my best friend. “Sure,” I responded.
I didn’t think that smile could get any wider. “Will you walk home with me?” her eyes glowed. Well it seemed that way, but the light blue just got lost in the white reflection of the light in the ceiling. It was from having to look up at me. I am by no means tall, just an average five foot eight inches, but Susie wasn’t more than five one.
“Yeah. Of course. Shall I meet you at your locker?”
“Okay.”
I stared off after her as she almost glided down the hall to her next class. Her pink skirt flowed about her knees in rhythm with the fluid motion of her legs. Beautiful legs I must say. I couldn’t see much of them, she had stockings that came up just below her knee. Only a small glimpse of olive toned skin escaped in the movement of the skirt.
A couple “popular” girls walked by. I couldn’t make out what they said to Susie, but they snickered afterwards, along with several jocks nearby. I didn’t worry. Susie made some sort of polite reply and skipped on. I could hear her saying “Thank you” or something of the like, even though it wasn’t a compliment she had been given. She was so kind.
At the tolling of the final bell I hadn’t as much homework as I expected. Good thing too. I would have felt guilty if I couldn’t spend hours pouring over Calculus problems or Nuclear Physics equations. Taking time to study integrals and splitting atoms were Cleo and I’s favorite past time. He may get upset, but I would just let him out early or something.
I met Susie at her locker like we planned. That smile hadn’t faded at all and we started to walk to her house in silence. For some reason there wasn’t much to say. I stole glances at her as we walked, noticing her lithe form or the curve of her chin and neck. Sometimes she would look at me and smile, then when we both looked away I would catch the smile fade in my peripheral vision. It would still be there, but it lost some of its luster.
“You know what I just realized,” I said at last.
“What?” she replied.
“That I have no idea where you live.”
“Heehee. I know.”
“Where is your house?”
“You’ll see.”
I shrugged. A mystery. I like it.
“There it is,” she said at last. Nestled with a bunch of other plain, white shingled, run down houses was Susie’s. We walked up an uneven stone pathway and up to the front door.
It was open. Susie swung it inward, but remained standing out of the way so I could enter before her.
“Ladies first,” I politely replied to her sweeping hand gesture. She smiled in response and entered her house. I followed suit and stopped while she closed the door behind me. It was a nice home. Plush carpet, two floors, and well furnished; it was nothing like what the outside hinted at.
“You home Susie,” a deep voice called from one of the rooms of the house.
“Yes dad,” Susie replied.
The big man came out of what appeared to be the dinning room on the left. A remote in one hand and a half empty beer bottle in the other.
“Who’s this?” he asked.
“Sebastian. He’s a friend from school,” Susie said. I felt awkward with my messenger bag weighing down my left shoulder.
“Hi sir,” I said.
“Is that what you kids are calling it these days,” was his reply.
Susie grabbed my hand pulled me towards the stairs, “I’ll show you my room. Later dad.”
“Keep that door open Susie, you understand me,” he called to our backs.
“I will dad,” she replied. At the top of the stairs she dragged me to the left and into a small room. Pink walls, pink sheets, pink comforter, pink pillow case, pink everything. Girls and their pink. I have nothing against pink; just so much isn’t good for anyone’s eyes.
“This is my room.”
“It’s pink,” I state flatly.
“You don’t like it?”
“Do you like it?”
“Yes.”
“Then I like it. So why did you want me to come over? Help with homework?”
She didn’t reply right away, “Can I ask you something?”
“Yeah.” I was puzzled to say the least.
“Why can’t you sleep?”
“I have insomnia.”
“Well then why aren’t you taking any medication?”
“My dad doesn’t want to pay for it.”
“I could help you sleep.”
“How?”
“I know some natural remedies.”
Truly intriguing. It would be nice to sleep again. “I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“It wouldn’t be good for me. I should go.” I turn to leave, resolved, uncomfortable. Homework was important.
“Wait.”
It was too late. I was out the door.
Home alone again.
“It’s about time,” Cleo returned. He sounded upset. That was to be expected with how late I was.
After dinner I headed back up to the mountain. Clouds obscured the moon and its silver glow. However, I had been up there so many times that I could find my way on the darkest nights.
Maybe Susie is the one who could help me save people. There is so much to accomplish and so little time. Her kindness would be a great asset.
“Don’t kid yourself,” Cleo was skeptical.
“Why not? She is nice. You can’t deny that,” I replied.
Like me, she didn’t care about social status. Such things are below people like us. Society taints everything it touches. There is so much pain and sorrow. No one is solving a damn thing. All there are is perception after perception. Pointing the finger at someone else to edge out of the blame. Everyone is to blame.
“Even the innocent child that just popped out of its mother,” Cleo agreed.
“No. It’s innocent,” I argued. “You’re missing the point.”
“Who’s missing the point?” Susie’s voice rang out from behind me.
I didn’t turn around. I could feel anger well within me. Cleo didn’t like visitors when he was expressing himself. I was just a helpless bystander.
“Sebastian?” Susie persisted, coming to stand right behind me.
Cleo just lashed out like he was used to. He couldn’t help it. This was his time. She interrupted it. He dealt with her appropriately in his mind. Some things are worse than others. My dad was right.
I couldn’t do a thing. Cleo had complete control. I wouldn’t have harmed Susie. I liked Susie. She was my best friend, my only friend.
* * * * * *
So what do you think? I think it's a pretty weird story. I wrote it for my intro to fiction class last semester. It was the second story I wrote for that class. So it is actually thrown together over the course of two weeks. I liked it was it was coming out, but it still needs some editing. However, right now I don't really like it enough to edit it, so I'll put it up here.
Next week I'll put up another one. Enjoy.
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